Friday, September 23, 2005

Much A-Don't About Nothin'

Okay, I know it's not real important with all that has been going on in the world lately, but humor me for a minute. What the hell does "moisturizes my situation and maintains my sexy" mean? This phrase was said by Sean Combs as he was talking with Vanessa Williams on one of those corny-ass Proactiv infomercials. I mean, who wrote that shit for him? It makes him sound like he's trying to be "ultra cool" or skipped a few classes of English! Wait, did he even finish school? You know, Kanye is making money off of being a "college dropout", so why not Sean Combs? I refuse to call him "Puffy, " "P. Diddy" or "Puff Daddy." Makes him sound like a Teletubby or a big, purple dinosaur or some shit - "I love you, you love me, everybody loves PUFF DADDY." Get the fuck out of here with that! *LOL*

Anyway, my husband and I celebrated being together for 5 years yesterday evening. We met and had our first date on Friday, September 22, 2000, and the rest is history. For him, I bought a half-dozen pink roses and gave him a card. He didn't give me anything special, but I'm sure he'll make up for it later this weekend. ;) We ordered some take out from The Cheesecake Factory, went home, watched some Good Times on T.V. Land, some Soul Food on BET (which is one of the only decent programs that come on that channel, but I'll write about BET another day), and had a great time sharing that chocolate mousse cheescake! YUM! We also decided to talk about what we liked about one another, and that was fun!

Hair today: Big, curly shake-'n-go puff!
Look: Casual. I'm wearing my oversized, comfy, green FOTL T-shirt and black stretch pants. It's Friday, and I think Fridays should automatically be casual day* in EVERY workplace.

*Note: Casual does NOT mean coming into work with rollers all up in your hair or wearing that infamous CURL BAG on your head and in your jammies/lingerie/underwear and feather boa mules or Mickey Mouse slippers.

V

Thursday, September 22, 2005

CRAZY WEATHER!

Just after most New Orleans was washed away from Hurricane Katrina, another hurricane looms on the horizon, this time not only threatening to do more damage to New Orleans, but also affecting cities in Texas. Good grief on a corn dog stick!! I feel like this insane weather pattern is never going to end. I wouldn't be surprised to hear if there was a report that another tropical storm had turned into a hurricane in the near future...which I hope doesn't happen, but who knew that Hurricane Rita was going to happen?

Then, last night, all hell broke loose in Minnesota with tornadoes popping up in various cities and severe thunderstorms washing over others. Heavy winds, bigger than golf-ball sized hail, trees down, power outages - definitely one of the worst storms we've had in a while. Hubby and I definitely thought we'd have to get Wizard of Oz up in our place and hide out in the basement, but thankfully, we were able to just hole up in our bedroom with our kitties until the storm blew over. It was so hot during the morning and afternoon, and after hubby and I got home, we were so zapped, we took a nap. After we woke up, though, it was a different story. It got so dark around 6:30 or 7, that it looked like midnight! Glad we made it through and no damage happened in our area.

Unfortunately, north Minneapolis and certain other areas got the brunt of the damage. Some automatic doors that were on a Best Buy store in Brooklyn Center were blown off due to straight-line winds. We are just blessed that we were spared, but you never know what may happen next time. Thanks, God for watching over us and blessing us!

Heard from my other friend, Doris, last evening via e-mail. She is the sistah who bought the other concert ticket from me in North Carolina. She just turned 51 on September 10th, but she looks like she's 30. Beautiful, hightly intelligent, laid-back, really cool sistah. So glad that we were able to meet. I totally forgot her birthday, so I sent her a belated e-card.

That's all for now. If I run into anymore bathroom problems, lI'll update my Bathroom Etiquette entry. :)

Wednesday, September 21, 2005

Bathroom Etiquette

Okay, now I don't know what the hell is wrong with people and why they can't wash their hands after they use a toilet, but it's uncalled for and completely disgusting!!

I was in the bathroom today, and as I came out of the stall to wash my hands, an older woman came out of her stall. You see where this is going, right? Yep, the woman left without letting so much as a drop of soap or water touch her filthy, grimy, piss- and/or shit-covered hands. *HORK!!!* What the hell is wrong!!?!!

So here are some tried and true bathroom etiquette tips that I made up, and while I'm sure the majority of the population already knows this stuff, there are obviously plenty of other folks who act like they don't have any common sense when it comes to bathroom etiquette, so here I go:

1. When entering a bathroom and others are in the stall, politely wait near the door, AWAY from the stall - not in front of the stall, not on the side of it, and for the love all that's good, DON'T FUCKING KNOCK ON THE STALL DOOR AND ASK IF SOMEONE IS IN THERE. If the door is closed and you see some pants rolled down or some shoes sticking out, more than likely, SOMEONE IS IN THERE! And don't let your kids run wild either because they are more than likely to try and enter a stall even when someone else is occupying it, and if the knob is broken or the door cannot be kept shut and they bust in on somebody, they're gonna get an eyeful of something that maybe they shouldn't!

2. When you do acquire a stall, do your business as fast as possible, and please, do not conduct business or conversate with your homies on a cell phone while sitting on the toilet. I DO NOT need to know if the stocks rose or fell today or if you gon' meet up "with the gang" after work for happy hour or the latest celebrity or neighborhood gossip.


3. After you are done using the stall, PLEASE , PLEASE, PLEASE FLUSH THE TOILET and clean the toilet seat if anything is on it! The person who has to use the stall after you doesn't want to see and/or smell whatever the fuck has come out of you!!!! Ladies, if you are on your period and make a mess, CLEAN THAT SHIT UP AND PROPERLY DISPOSE OF PADS AND TAMPONS. Do not leave blood on the seat or in the toilet and MOST IMPORTANTLY, unless Always, Stayfree or Kotex have come out with flushable pads, DO NOT FUCKING TRY TO FLUSH YOUR PAD. Nasty ass bitches.

4. If you ABSOLUTELY need to take a shit, please keep the farting to a minimum, do it as quickly as possible and do regularly execute COURTESY FLUSHES. What I mean is, every time a log falls, FLUSH IT AWAY. If you know you are going to do a #2 beforehand, you might want to have a can of air freshener, some incense or a matchbook handy and bring it with you so you won't funk up the entire bathroom while handling your business.


5. Last, but certainly not least, when you are done using the bathroom, PLEASE, FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS HOLY, WASH YOUR FUCKING HANDS!!! I cannot stress enough how important this is, and NO, SIMPLY RINSING YOUR HANDS WITH WATER DOES NOT COUNT!! Folks who do not wash their hands after using the bathroom are the assholes who help to spread colds, flu, hepatitis and who knows what the hell else?!

Thank you!

This has been a public service announcement from VLM's World. Please feel free to post additional bathroom etiquette tips that you can think of!

V

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

Goofin' Around

I thought I'd goof around today with my blog and change it up a little bit by adding some personal touches to it, if you will.

Tonight, I will be sitting at home watching
Gilmore Girls! It's getting good, y'all!

Afro Picks and Chico Sticks!

V

Monday, September 19, 2005

Thoughts For Today

I gained a new, true friend, and she and I went out to dinner, saw a play and hung out at her house afterwards this past Saturday evening. She is someone who worked at the same company as I did earlier this year, and we spoke to each other in passing while I was still employed there, but not a lot. I knew, however, that she was someone with whom I wanted to communicate. The day after I quit that job, I e-mailed her, she responded to the e-mail, and she I have been friends ever since. She invited me to a "Ladies Night Out" party a day or two after we started chatting, and it was wonderful! Then, she and I met at the Cheesecake Factory a week or so later. When we met, she gave me a gift bag, and I asked her what it was. She said that there was a card and birthday gifts for me. I barely even knew her at that time, yet, she thought enough of me to give me a belated birthday present. I'm happier than I've ever been, and I've finally got a REAL friend.

Sunday, September 11, 2005

No More Buying Used Furniture!

OH MY FUCKING WHAT!

My husband and I were looking for a sofa, so I began to browse the ads here on Craigslist. I came across an ad for a sofa that had a picture attached to it. The sofa appeared to be decent, so my husband and I agreed to contact the seller and get more info about it. The ad was placed around Sunday, August 21st. I contacted the seller the evening of the 21st, and she and I set up a time for my husband and I to come over to her apartment and check the sofa out. We went over to the seller's apartment that next evening, the 22nd. We liked the sofa and decided to purchase it. We also paid an extra $20 to have her and her dad haul it to our place. They delivered the sofa to our home on August 27th, I paid the seller for the sofa and delivery, and the transaction was complete. Everything was going well, until my husband and I started smelling something foul that seemed to be coming from this sofa about a week or so ago. I had an idea of what the smell might be, but I didn't believe that it could have been that particular smell. My worst fears were confirmed, however, as you will find out below. We just sprayed some Febreeze on the sofa and thought nothing more of it...until this evening. I was lying on this sofa this evening, and all of a sudden, I saw MAGGOTS crawling on the floor. I jump up, thinking WHERE THE HELL DID THEY COME FROM?!! Sure enough, they were coming from the sofa. When my husband moved the sofa, more maggots crawled out, and sure enough, like I thought, THERE WAS A DEAD RAT UNDERNEATH THE SOFA. The rat was obviously living in this sofa before it was moved to our place, and whether or not the owner knew she had a rodent problem, I don't know, it was HORRIBLE AND DISGUSTING. My husband immediately hauled the sofa out. My skin is STILL crawling. I will never purchase another piece of used furniture from a private owner, whether from Craigslist or otherwise.

BE CAREFUL!!

Thursday, September 08, 2005

Kanye -Schmayne - Who Gives a Damn?

If I read another message or if another person asks me, "Did you hear what KAYNE said?", I think I will scream!! I don't give a damn about what he said, and furthermore, what he said wasn't deep, enlightening or awe-inspiring. He just said his opinion about Bush, and all of a sudden, he's the new Black American Hero. Folks are all over it. I think the only reason this is so is because he's a popular black celebrity. Hell, even if 50-Cent said it, he probably would be deemed deep, too. I don't see or understand what the big deal is. Bush not caring about black people is nothing new. The government not coming to the aid of black folks is also not new. Michael Moore punks down the government every day, and more people hate on him and give him less props that they are giving Kanye West now.

I do feel bad about what happened regarding those who survived or didn't survive the hurricane, but I personally would like a break from hearing about either what he said or Hurricane Katrina, but the only way by cutting myself off completely from the media. Maybe I need to do that. Then, I wouldn't have to hear about Kanye and his oh-so wonderful speech again.